Stupid Bets
by ThisiswhereIputmystories
Summary: Tired of losing yet another bet, Sulu bets Chekov that he can't kiss every crewmember on the Enterprise in one week, thinking that his friend won't even start. He's very wrong- about more than one thing. Chulu, very fluffy. Spirk if you squint, as well as some ScottyxEnterprise. No spoilers.


Hikaru Sulu frowned, brow furrowing. "Fine, you were right about what Kirk was up to during shore leave. But that doesn't mean you always win bets."

Chekov smirked. "Really? I also vun ze bet about how often Meester Spock has haircuts, and you had to pay me ze ten credits vhen I vent down the slide at zat amoosment park on Colony VI, and-"

"That one hardly counted. You were screaming the whole time.

"Zat vas not part of ze deal. You are just mad zat you newer vin."

"No, I just don't believe that you always do."

"Fine." The teenager reached over and turned off the holovid they had been watching before their argument started and turned around to stare at Sulu, who was lying on his bed. "Zhen- gif me an eempossible challenge."

"Impossible?"

"Da. Vell- eempossible for somevun like you."

A wide grin broke out across Sulu's face. "Someone like me?"

Chekov nodded earnestly.

"Alright. I dare you…" He trailed off, glancing up at the ceiling for some evasive answer. It had to be something good, something hard, something that would embarrass his friend-

"I dare you to kiss everyone on the Enterprise in one week."

He looked a bit shocked at that, swallowing and biting his lower lip. "Eweryvun?"

"Every single man, woman, Vulcan- every crew member."

"Okay."

"Seriously? I didn't expect you to agree."

"Zat is no problem." Chekov shrugged. "I haff already kissed half of ze crew."

"Yeah, right. If you win, you get bragging rights and…"

"Ze loser has to run around ze ship veering nozing but undervear and ees not allowed to explain vhy."

Sulu laughed. The kid could be evil sometimes. It would backfire, though. There was no way he could make out with everyone. For one, he was the baby. He would get embarrassed. Added to that, there were over 400 people aboard the ship, and plenty who wouldn't be willing to kiss a babbling teenage boy, however cute he was. But of course, Sulu didn't think he was cute. No. Totally not. "You sound confident that you'll win.

"I am."

Chekov got started the next day. To no one's surprise, he utilized his natural charms to pull aside Kirk during breakfast and start talking at warp speed about the mission they were working on. From where Sulu was sitting at his usual table with Riley and Uhura, he could see how the kid was jumping up and down.

"Alright, kid, I know that you're excited about the science institute there- but have you heard about the _bars?_ They're the highlight of the place."

"But zey are experimenting vith colliders as large as-"

"I know it's all exciting and science-y and stuff, but can I go talk to Spock now?"

"Da, sorry, sir, I did not mean to bozher you." He deflated, eyes widening into a decent impression of a kicked puppy. Sulu knew the routine- God knew it had been used on him often enough.

"Hey, you know what?" Kirk grinned, resting a hand on Chekov's shoulder. "How about we all go out to drink during shore leave- just the bridge crew. You can tell me all about the research facilities."

"Aye, sir!" He smiled again, eyes brightening. "Also, vould it be possible for me to get a list of ewery serwing crew member?"

The two failed pronunciations of "v" seemed cute enough to sway Kirk to agree. "Yeah, I'll forward you a list in a minute, okay?"

"Okay! Zhank you!"

Chekov skipped- visibly skipped, and Sulu smirked at the sight of it- over to their table and sat down next to Sulu, stealing a slightly dry replicated muffin from his tray.

"Hey." Sulu snatched it back before breaking it in half and offering him a piece. "What was that all about?"

Chekov's PADD pinged, signaling that he had a new message. He placed a finger on the screen. "Now I haff a list of all ze people zat I need to kiss."

"You're really going to do it, aren't you?"

"Da. Starting now, and zhen I vill haff my vun veek."

"Your accent is really obvious sometimes." Sulu teased.

"Eet vould not be eef you helped me vork on my English sometimes!"

"Nah." Sulu tossed him an apple. "It's too adorable to stop."

He immediately regretted saying that, it was stupid- except it was true. Chekov hadn't noticed it, anyways. He was already asking Uhura if he could kiss her.

Sulu thought it was sweet that he was asking permission.

"HIKARU! Open up, please, queekly!"

Sulu sprang up from his desk and tripped over a pile of Chekov's books (_why did his stuff always end up in his room?_) and opened the door, dashing out as it slid wide enough to let him step through.

Chekov was standing outside, nervously hopping up and down.

"What did you do now?" Last he knew, the kid was systematically working his way through everyone working in engineering, with hopes of getting started on the security teams before the day ended.

"Please let me in!" He didn't bother to pull the puppy eyes, just nervously bit his lip as he always did.

"Okay…?" He stepped aside, just avoiding the streak of light that was Chekov as he sprang into the room.

"Now lock ze door!"

"Oh my God, Pav, what's wrong with you?"

"Do it!"

Sulu complied and watched as Chekov slumped to the floor, leaning against the wall and breathing heavily. God, was he hot- lean and strong and lithe with his stupidly curly hair and that voice and-

He needed to stop thinking about this.

"What did you do?" He repeated, for lack of anything else to say.

Chekov wheezed. "Do you know ze security officer Keptin Kork calls Cupcake?"

"Yeah- the big one?"

"Da. He does not like being kissed wery much."

As if on cue, Sulu heard footsteps pounding in the hallway. "Did he chase you?"

"Vell- first he punched me, zhen I ran."

"Oh my God." Sulu crouched down in front of his friend- best friend, honestly- and lifted his chin. Surely enough, there was a dark spot forming under his eye, along with a red cheek and a small scratch. "I'm sorry, Pav, it was a stupid dare. I didn't think it through. You really don't have to finish."

"Nyet, I vant to!" He nodded earnestly. "Ze only problem ees that now I vill probably haff a black eye, so eet may be bad for my appearance. No vun vill vant to kiss me eef they know I vas in a fight."

"You weren't in a fight; you got beaten up." Sulu gripped Chekov's arm and led him to the bathroom, retrieving the Starfleet issue first aid kit in the small cabinet next to the mirror. He rummaged around for a moment before locating some antiseptic wipes. "Idiot." He teased as he wiped at the scratch on Chekov's face, looking at his hand so their eyes didn't meet and holding him steady, one hand resting on the smooth curve of his neck.

"Eet vas only fair. I kissed him without warning. Eet vas rude."

"I thought you were asking people first."

"I zhought zat eet vould be better to surprise him. He vould not haff agreed."

"And what did you learn?" Sulu asked, quickly taking on the tone of a scolding mother.

"Zat Cupcake ees not a good kisser."

Sulu grinned. "Not quite- but ll done." He set the wipe on the counted and ruffled Chekov's hair.

"Hey!" Chekov ducked away and was promptly chased back into Sulu's room and collapsed on his bed. "He vas definitely not as good as Riley."

"Yeah, I saw you guys making out at breakfast the other day. I couldn't tell who was more into it." Riley had quickly agreed to Chekov's wish, leaning in and giving the most obviously staged kiss in the world, complete with a fake collapse into Chekov's arms at the end as he batted his eyelashes at the teenager.

"He vas wery good at doing the kissing." For the first time, Sulu considered the fact that Chekov might actually be more into guys than girls.

Sulu sat on the bed beside Chekov. "Pav- you do know that he didn't take it seriously, right?"

"Da. I am just saying, zat since I vas giwen the opportunity, eet vad good to take adwantage off."

"Alright then- who was the best kisser so far?" Sulu decided to humor him. He had been excited about the entire experience. Overeager, to be honest. Sulu was relatively surprised that he wasn't embarrassed about making out with everyone- not at all. Then again, he was a teenager. He probably dreamt about this kind of stuff on a daily basis.

"I do not zheenk zat I haff reached ze best vuns yet, alzhough besides Riley, Yeoman Rand vas nice. She smelled like flowers." Definitely bi. This gave Sulu hope, and he didn't know why. Then again, he had suspected that the kid was attracted to everything and everyone for a while.

"I smell like flowers." This was natural: Sulu spent a lot of his free time down in botany.

"You do." Chekov rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling. "Scotty vas a poor kisser."

"Scotty only has eyes for the Enterprise."

Chekov snorted. "Zat ees true."

They played holovideo games for a bit, until Chekov lost for the umpteenth time and decided that it was safe to venture out and continue on his mission.

"Only zhree-hundred and forty-sewen crewmembers left to kiss!" He said brightly as he left.

"God." Sulu grinned. "You're only on day two."

By the next day, Sulu was tired of the entire ordeal. In fact- he was getting particularly annoyed. He snapped the third time someone began a story about how _they_ were kissed by Chekov.

"He's absolutely adorable. Have you met him? Super cute, and with that accent, he's practically irresistible." The ensign in question babbled as she poked at the buttons on the replicator in front of her.

_You'd better resist, then._ Sulu was behind her in line, gripping his tray tightly.

"He's going around trying to kiss everyone on board. Did you know that?"

Of course he knew that. Chekov was his. His friend, of course. What right does she have to be talking about him like he's the latest catch, or some puppy she found on the street?

He stared at her for a moment. "Yes, I know. I've known him since the Academy, and I was the one who bet him he couldn't do it. Leave me alone."

She held up her arms in defense. "Sorry."

"'Karu, what's wrong?"

Sulu spun around. Chekov was standing a foot away, head cocked to the side with curiosity. "Nothing!"

"Okay. I haff kissed over a hundred people!"

Great. A hundred people who now thought they had a monopoly over the kid. Absolutely great. Sulu frowned and turned back, stepping forward to the replicator when he noticed that the other woman was gone. "Soup or a sandwich?"

"Soups." Chekov peered over his shoulder, pointing at one of the pre-programmed specials of the day . "Zat vun."

After Sulu had finished getting his dinner and Chekov had made his, they wove around the various tables and sat at their normal place. Sulu spent a minute fighting off Chekov 's attempts to eat his soup by using his spoon as a sword (or, to be specific, a fencing foil), but gave up quickly. If the kid wanted to eat, he should let him.

"So," Chekov started, wiping at a bit of broth that had dripped down onto his chin, "how do you zhink I should go about keesing Meester Spock?"

Sulu used his sleeve to rub at Chekov's face. God, he was as messy as a little kid. Was he the same person who was making out with the entire crew? "Spock? I don't have a clue. I'd ask the captain for advice there."

"Zhe Keptin? Vhat?"

"Nevermind. You don't have to kiss Spock. I don't want you to perish under the wrath of logic."

"Zhe wrath of logic? Nyet, I zhink zat _he_ vill perish under zhe wrath of seduction."

Sulu choked on his mouthful of soup, making a show out of wheezing and hacking. Chekov looked worried for a moment, clapping a gentle hand on his back, until he realized that it was an exaggerated ploy.

"I suppose you vill not understand my methods, zhen."

"Oh my God, Pav, it's not going to work."

Chekov shrugged and took another spoonful of soup.

"I need to stop by sickbay." Chekov didn't look sick, but Sulu knew he had a crap immune system. He had spent plenty of time watching him when he was bedridden at the Academy and had even had the lovely (note: sarcasm) experience of carrying a sniffling Pavel three miles to a Starfleet base when he had come down with some severe alien flu on shore leave.

"Do you want me to come?" Sulu asked, knowing very well that he would follow the kid even if he said no.

"Eef you vant to." He took off down the hallway, clipping along at a pace that took Sulu a few brisk steps to catch up to. No sniffling, good posture, clear voice- well, as clear as it ever was. He wasn't sick.

Sulu continued looking him up and down until they reached the medbay.

It wasn't particularly crowded, although Sulu was sure that it would be full once they sent down an away team on the planet they were headed towards. Despite Starfleet's safety standards and precautions, everyone had a hell of a time getting into trouble.

"What do you want, kid?" Dr. McCoy stepped out of his office, polishing the barrel of a hypo on his sleeve.

"Ken you come look at my eyes?" Chekov asked, tilting his head.

Dr. McCoy set the hypo down on a nearby biobed and strolled over. "Alright, kid, now- what's wrong with you today?" He peered down at Chekov's face, furrowing his eyebrows and concentrating on his eyes.

They- those deep eyes, murky blue flecked with pale grey and green- met the doctor's and widened into a full Bambi impression. Sulu rolled his eyes as Chekov stood on his tiptoes and pecked McCoy on the lips.

"DAMMIT! What the f-"

"You had it coming." Sulu interrupted, grinning.

"What in tarnation was that all about?" McCoy steepled his fingers and glared at Chekov.

"It vas for a bet. Vith Hikaru." Chekov spun around, grabbing Sulu's sleeve. "Now ve need to go before ve are late for our sheeft!"

"Sorry about that." Sulu went a bit red as he was dragged out the door. "He's enthusiastic."

"You say?" McCoy grumbled, turning back to pick up his hypo.

They reached the bridge a minute later and took their respective seats as normal. Despite Chekov's worries, they were somewhat early- Spock was the only Alpha shift member who had arrived. After taking over their stations, Chekov asked Sulu to watch his and waltzed over to Spock's chair. Sulu tried not to stare at his bottom. It didn't work.

"Excuse me, Meester Spock?" Somehow, his voice deepened, his accent strong against his hoarse voice. No, not hoarse- more teenaged boy than anything, but in that moment, Hikaru would describe it as deep, almost _sexy._

"Yes, Ensign Chekov?" Spock spun around, raising an eyebrow.

The teenager's eyes were half-closed, revealing just a slit of his eyes; he was leaning against the wall nonchalantly, hips casually slung forward. His hand ran through his hair, ruffling the tight curls until they were even messier than usual. As his arm stretched up, the hem of his shirt lifted the tiniest bit, revealing a glimpse of smooth pale skin.

And, in that moment, Sulu knew that he was going to seduce Spock.

For the time being the first officer himself looked as stoic as ever, eyebrow still poised, but otherwise void of emotion. "Ensign Chekov?" He repeated.

"Yes, _sir."_ The last word came out as a near whisper, hissing through the static air of the bridge. Thank God no one else from their shift has arrived yet- no one else was seeing this. This- this- this sexy beast.

Hell. Sulu did not just think that.

Chekov gently pushed off from the wall, leaning down over Spock's chair and resting a hand on the back, an inch from Spock's shoulder. He bent down slightly until he was eye level with Spock, leaning forward and tilting his head slightly.

"Ensign- I must remind you to act professionally at-"

"Meester Spock," Chekov growled, voice low, "are you sure zat's vhat you vant?"

"En-"

The faintest hint of a smile played at Chekov's cupid bow lips, matched with a slight crinkling at the corners of his eyes as he hissed something in Russian. Something that- and remember that Sulu was no expert at languages, but thought he could identify the tone- was far too dirty for the situation.

Spock swallowed and began to push Chekov's arm away.

Instead of moving, the teenager leaned in further and let his hand fall onto Spock's shoulder, running it along the length of his arm with the his long fingers barely skimming the fabric of Spock's uniform. His other hand rested on the Vulcan's leg, supporting Chekov as he leaned in and closed the distance between Spock and himself.

Spock seemed frozen in terror or anticipation- Sulu wasn't sure which. However, he was frozen enough that he had no time to react as Chekov slowly (ever so slowly, Sulu thought, even though it lasted no more than a second) brushed his lips against the other man's and pressed himself against Spock, supporting the hand that had been on his arm on the back of Spock's head and viciously pushing against his lips. Sulu was pretty sure that he saw teeth skimming against Spock's lips before the Vulcan snapped away, pushing Chekov backwards.

"Hey!" A familiar voice called, accompanied by steps towards the middle of the room. "Is it some sort of kissing day? Can I have one?"

Chekov spun around and leapt back when he saw Kirk, nearly ramming into Spock again. "Sorry, Keptin, eet vas for a bet and-"

Kirk folded his arms and watched the ensign expectantly. "Where's my kiss?"

Chekov blinked before registering what the captain had said. "Oh- yes, sir." He obediently nodded and stepped closer to the captain, standing on his tiptoes to reach his face and carefully pressing his lips against Kirk's.

Kirk seemed ready to pull away when Chekov grabbed his shoulders without warning and deepened the kiss with a slight mumble, hands grasping the gold material for support. It lasted a full ten seconds with both men turning and pushing and grasping, until Kirk finally managed to break away.

"Damn. you're a good kisser."

"I haff had practice." Chekov said with a shrug before he returned to his station and started to talk to Sulu about how pretty the stars were.

Sulu knew he had lost the bet. He should have known, to be honest, however absurd it had seemed. He just had _really bad luck_. With bets, catching strange alien diseases, falling in love with the wrong person- not that that was coincidental in the first place.

He was expecting the proud announcement any second: Chekov would burst into his quarters accompanied by excited Russian yelps and dance around, grabbing Sulu's arm and swinging him about until they were both dizzy and fell onto the freshly made sheets of Sulu's bed. Sulu would remind the kid to be quiet so the man he shared his bathroom with could sleep for once. They'd hang out a bit, just the two of them, talking and talking and talking with Chekov slowly migrating around the room and touching Sulu far too much- not that he disliked it. It was just… the hand on his shoulder, the pulling him around, and the casual hugs were sometimes a bit too much to handle. He wanted-

More.

With the rate Chekov had been making out with the crew, Sulu was surprised that it had taken him until now, the fifth day of the challenge, to finish. Considering how he had been expecting his loss for a while, he wasn't surprised when there was a knock at his door. He told his room computer to open it and tried to rearrange himself to look nonchalant as Chekov strolled into the room and stood in front of the bed, shifting around slightly.

" 'Karu."

"Mmmhmm?" Sulu looked up from the PADD he had picked up, not noticing that the digital copy of _Treasure Island_ was upside down and in French.

"Come wiz me."

Sulu looked up from the book, taking in Chekov. No bruises, tears, or hickeys. He seemed to be in good order. He supposed the kid just needed a break. If he had finished, he would have announced it right off. _Probably wants to go mess around with the ship,_ Sulu decided firmly. That was all. They hadn't hung out as much as usual during the week, so Chekov probably wanted to catch up on their usual escapades.

"Alright, let me just put this away." Sulu rolled off the bed and stretched before sliding the PADD on his shelf, next to a few plants and a fencing mask. Chekov picked up the photo he was always looking at, the one of the bridge crew that was framed and sat on Sulu's desk. Sulu had asked him why he took such a fancy to the picture and after some persistence had been informed that Chekov didn't have any family pictures- and that's exactly what the photo was.

Sulu wished he could hug his friend sometimes, but he couldn't make an advance like that. Chekov was the one who initiated contact.

As if on cue, the kid took hold of his shoulders and steered him out of the room with a brisk command to the computer to turn off the lights and close the door as they left. Once in the brightly lit hall he let one hand fall to his side, slinging the other around Sulu's shoulder and grinning.

"Where are you bringing me today, Pav?"

"Obserwation deck zhree."

A straightforward answer. Kind of weird. Sulu took a moment to ponder this and nearly tripped over the step leading up the deck. Idiot. It was on the same floor as his quarters.

Pavel dragged him to the huge window that took up the entire wall, a slit in the hull of the ship that let everything else spill into the sterilized confines of the Enterprise. The teenager loved to watch the sky and would sit, legs crossed, in front of the window for hours when he was off duty. When Sulu couldn't find him he always went to the observation deck first and would sit down next to him, not so much watching the stars as the look of wonder on his best friend's face.

"Pav- did you win?"

Silence. Then- "No."

"Oh."

He sat down and Sulu sat beside him, like normal.

"Zhere vas vun person I haff not keesed."

"You still have time, you know." Sulu said, already thinking about who it could be- who Pavel couldn't kiss. Hell, he had made out with _Spock._ What was keeping him from finishing?

"Good. Alzhough, I hope I haff much more time for zhees vun. Eet's zhe most important."

Sulu let his eyes rest on Pavel. "Is it?"

"Da."

"Well, are you going to have an opportunity to kiss them?"

More silence. Pavel slid his eyes from gazing outside the window to watching Sulu, in total concentration. Eyes on Sulu and Sulu only.

And Sulu's mind finally clicked, automatically pushing him forward as Pavel leaned in, whispering, _"Right now."_

Their lips met, ever so slowly, and Sulu's eyes fluttered shut a moment after Pavel's closed as he softly sighed into Sulu, mouthing the name_ Hikaru_ and turning his head the tiniest bit to the left, the way he did when he was curious about something. He put the tiniest bit of pressure on Sulu's lips, different from the quick pecks and voracious mouth to mouth he had been doing for the past few days.

This one meant something.

Before the kiss deepened, with Pavel's tongue slipping into Sulu's mouth as the older man just barely moaned, they were nestled in each other's arms- softly wrapped in place so neither ever wanted to move. After a few minutes they managed to fall away from each other and spent the rest of the night curled into each other, watching the stars and each other at random intervals.

Pavel won the bet.

**Note of Importance: Every time the crew recruited new members, Pavel was always sure to congratulate them on their new position, give them some useful tips (the replicator in rec room six only produced food that tastes like fish!), and finish with a quick kiss. He needs to maintain his role as the only person who's kissed every crewmember on the Enterprise.**

** His kisses with Sulu mean so much more.**


End file.
